In QLD, Family Violence is defined by the Domestic and Family Violence Protection Act 2012.
DOMESTIC & FAMILY VIOLENCE includes but is not restricted to:
- Physical violence includes hitting, pushing, spitting, using weapons, being thrown against walls etc
- Emotional and Verbal abuse includes comments and behaviour that makes you feel worthless like put downs, shouting and sulking
- Sexual abuse includes rape and any forced or unwanted sexual contact any forced or unwanted sexual contact with family members in the car
- Stalking behaviour, includes constant following or contacting by phone, text, email etc
- Spiritual abuse
- Damage to property, includes breaking or threats to break household or personal goods
- Technology abuse , includes hacking into email or social network account (facebook), posting online abusive statements or images without consent, using GPS tracking devised etc.
- Financial abuse can include controlling and withholding money or not allowing a say in how money is spent
- Social abuse includes cutting you off from family and friends, making you account constantly for everything you do, embarrassing you and keeping you from from earning your own money
- Intimidation using body size or movement, coercion and threats for example to injure or kill self or family members, driving dangerously with family members in the car
You are not to blame for your partner's violence
You have the right to be safe You have a right to a life free of violence
It may be helpful to look at the ways you've coped until now:
- You may have been careful about what you say, when and how you say it
- You have 'tiptoed' around their moods
- You encourage the kids to be be quiet around them
- You try to do all the right things eg. Cook dinners, keep the house tidy, etc
- You see less of your friends and family
- You keep the peace wherever possible
- You change your own behaviour according to what they want
- You handle all family matters on your own to make it easier for them
- You try to protect the kids from the effects of violence
- You have tried to talk to your partner about their alcoholism, stress levels or moods
- Your body senses danger long before your mind consciously works out why you sense it.
- It is vital that you trust and act on these instincts, especially if you sense danger being in a certain place or with a certain person.
- You may have had support from friends and family.
- Sometimes friends and family may not understand the danger you and your children are in.
- You are the best judge of how safe you are. You can talk to others about your plan to keep yourself and your children safe.
- Call the Police
- Obtain a Protection Order
- Tell friends or neighbours
- Believe it isn't your fault
- See that violence is a crime
- Feel compassion for yourself and your children
- Accept that abuse has caused you great pain
- Recognise that you have already done a lot to try and change things